Tuesday, October 14, 2008

bursting at every seem!!

i love ....i love that i am sooo far out of the clouds (i was so far in the dark ones this past year) ..or should i say in them now(but they are all white and light and fluffy)...i am so glad that it all worked out (!) and that i am better and stronger and happier...but mostly that i feel LOVE again.. i just got all teared by that but i Mean it.... i was full of it before (oh god was i but it was new and i didn't know what to expect so i leap with out any consideration..do i regret it..i did for a bit..but i don't any longer) ...and now i feel it like i never have...and due to so many amazing people from my past and from my present and from my right NOW!!

oh how i wish i could just scream...most the times i just have to swirl the energy back inside or just push it out as hard as i can...which means i am usually running or jumping or squirming or shaking to move it in and through and out and beyond...and if you know me ..you have probably seen me do this...and wondered what the hell i was doing...well that was it!.

i have heard people comment on it or how i act and i am out of control but in a good way...and its at those moments that i am bursting..BURSTING ..and i cant talk fast enough to explain it to them or if i tried they would not get it anyways....some grin like they do and god i hope they do..and if i get an ounce of them getting it i usually grab them and hug them so i can get and give from them right then and there. or they would just like at me like i am crazy and that is usually when i run away to share the burst with as many as i can cuz i know i am overwhelming and tapping that person....or scaring the living day lights of them!! doe that makes since to you...

sure it looks like i am on hard drugs at those moments but you know what...there is NOT a drug on this planet that has ever or will ever match these moments ..can you tell i am having one and trying to put it to words so i can capture it and get it out there...ahahahah...for they are complete joy and bliss!! god i just wish i could bring all the people i love along for the trip too!!

tell me, explain to me..if this happens to you WHAT does it feel like for you..i wanna know i wanna share... i wanna bask together!! ahahah i so need to go outside and scream!!


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